Wednesday 28 November 2007

Justin Miller: Ascension

In the beginning

It was perhaps a colder day in the Magic Cafe when Justin Miller announced he is leaving magic. Armchair magicians and old farts with cards and coins in hand all cried out at the loss of a talented young man. Justin bid a tearful goodbye, and left magic saying it conflicts with his religious beliefs.

Four months later...

The second coming

Fast forward to January 2007:

I truly believe that God asked me to "lay it down" and for me, it meant getting rid of the OLD so HE can FILL me with the NEW! It's all good! - Justin Miller

The heavens parted, a light came down onto Justin. A voice, that only Justin could hear, boomed across the sky "Pick up thy cards". Was it the voice of the Holy Father? Maybe Jesus? No one really knows. It prompted this boy, who has become a man, to put on his sparkley vest and be a magician again. (Well, either that or it could be that Justin's wife just plopped out a kid and he needs cash.)

So Justin Miller begins lecturing and creating magic; some of it even, wasn't too bad. This need to spread his magic grows, and every dollar, which is no doubt donated to the painting of churches across America, is appreciated... then it happens.

The Devil Calls

The Satan of magic, Brad Christian, entices Justin to join the ranks of ... (gasp) ELLUSIONIST.

The evil corporation of greed and gestapo tactics has brainwashed our beloved Justin into their legion.

Justin Miller now sits next to his equally brainwashed comrade, Daniel Garcia (who is known to take other magician's ideas, give them a spiffy name and release them). Hell has claimed one of our own.

Money, Fame, Fanboys, Rentboys

Justin presides from his evil throne, which is made from the tongues and fingers of those who dared to type a negative word on the Ellusionist forums. Justin is famous for releasing magic tricks and has his own legion of 12 year old boys eager to defend their master's every attempt at magic. They hail it all as the greatest ever produced. Every month.

Lightning crashes overhead as Brad Christian looks down at it all with a wicked cackle, while the mountain of cash he stands on grows ever higher. Justin's once proud Silver Dream serves only to fuel Brad's piles of sordid gold.

Justin, you are now in the league of the devil. Jesus is watching!


6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow!
I must say I am very shocked at this post (not surprised) but truly shocked.

First thing first I, Danny, nor Wayne are with E anymore.

We have all gone diff. ways. I am Christian and it seems from your blogg that you are making fun of my faith in God!

WOW..is all I have to say.

Justin N. Miller

Yes the REAL Justin Miller

www.closeupjm.com

Anonymous said...

I met Justin and spent several days in Ohio at the convention. I cannot tell you how impressed I was with the type of person he is, not to mention one of the greatest card and coin workers in the US. A true gentleman and a great ambassador for the world of Magic.

Joe Snyder

Anonymous said...

Here's the latest from Justin

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IpsQx05mhCc&feature=player_embedded

Anonymous said...

that was really quite funny

Unknown said...

I thought so
JM

Anonymous said...

and Now??
Justin Miller
February 4 at 1:59pm · Edited ·
2 waves of deletion on FB coming soon. I have over 700 requests waiting in the wings and I am wasting so much of my thoughts and ideas with Ignorant and FUCKED up people who still believe in fairy tales, I am sick of hanging with children. Time to step away from the kids table and have a scotch with the adults.
So If you post shit like "jesus is your friend, hit like if you agree, or spend eternity in hell by scrolling" your FUCKING gone. If you have said "thank goodness god protected the survivors of (insert horrible situation here)" but could give a shit about the other 100s of people that died Your FUCKING gone. If you are so closed minded that you think you are right and everyone else is wrong You are FUCKING gone. I am not getting rid of every christian friend or muslim friend, just the dark aged ones. Oh and if you think 2 woman or 2 men having sex or getting married is against some fairy in the skies "laws" or that they will spend eternity burning in a furnace you are FUCKING gone. First wave starts NOW!.
Goooood Luck!
JM